You Can't Cry Forever

Is it just me or do you ever have those days where you just feel like crying nonstop? You are overwhelmed, or hurt, or angry, and you just can't seem to pull yourself out of that awful state?

This was me last night. I had just gotten home from an extremely long day, and I felt completely, utterly, totally overwhelmed. I cried on the way home, I cried when I got home, I cried in the shower. And then it hit me.

I already know that crying doesn't help solve anything. I think we all know that. But when we are in the moment of sadness, anger, stress, etc., it can be hard to see past the current state that you are in. But once I was able to calm myself down, I had a realization that struck a chord.

You can't cry forever. You can't be angry forever. You can't be afraid forever. Yes, things happen in our lives that we can't control. You get overwhelmed by work, and school, and life, and you feel like you are drowning in the midst of it all. Someone hurts you in a bad way, and you just can't seem to forgive and forget. Something happened in your past that is stopping you from enjoying life in the present.

Whatever the case may be, you have to come to a point where you realize that you can't stay in that mindset forever. Sure, you technically can sulk and whine for days, weeks, months, even years. But what good does that do you? There comes a time when you have to pick yourself up and move on.

Feel overwhelmed for an hour. Cry for an hour. But don't cry for a whole night. Stop the tears and realize that you have to start somewhere (see this post for more on that) in order to get anywhere.

You are allowed to feel angry and upset over a wrong that someone did to you. And you can be angry for a time. But don't stretch that time for too long, allowing that anger and bitterness to take over your life. Eventually, you have to reach that point where you realize that the hurt you've been carrying around with you is simply not worth it. Put away your pride, forgive, and move on.

As hard as I know that it is, try and see past whatever emotion you are feeling. See past all the piles of unfinished homework, past the anger against the person that wronged you, past the memory that has been keeping you from enjoying life. Look beyond all of those things and see that there is so much life and happiness waiting for you on the other side. All you have to do is pick yourself up, and begin moving forward.

I will leave you with one of my favorite Bible verses:
                 Psalm 30:5 - "Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning"

Try and see past the sorrow of the night to the joyful morning that lies ahead.

Sick Days: Tips for How to Deal

Is it just me or do you ever feel really crummy? You feel sick and want to just lay on the couch and binge-watch Netflix all day?

I don't feel very well today, and I would love nothing more than to curl up with some hot tea and Christmas movies. But sometimes, I can't always do that. Sometimes, we have responsibilities that we have to tend to, even when we aren't feeling our best. 

I am writing this post in hopes that it will help not only some of you, but also myself! Below are some tips I've come up with to help you get through your sick days. 

1. Take a nice, hot shower. Sometimes, simply taking a shower when I'm sick makes me feel so much better. Give yourself some extra time in the morning to take a long, hot shower and wash away the sick-y feelings!

2. Dress comfy. I know for me, I don't exactly want to dress in my Sunday best when I'm feeling under the weather. Throw on something that is comfy, cozy, and makes you feel good.

3. Drink lots of water. I know I sound like a doctor here, but seriously, drinking tons of water (especially when you are sick) is really good for you. It helps your body to stay hydrated, replaces the water that it is using up, and flushes out toxins. 

4. Give yourself some time to rest. Even if you have to go out and do a few things during your day, take some time in the morning or when you get home to just rest. It is so important for your body to recoup, so take some time to just chill out.

5. Put on a happy face. While it is important to acknowledge the fact that you are sick and need rest, I sometimes find that acting happy actually makes me feel a little bit better. If I mope around the entire day, I usually end up feeling worse. Instead, try smiling a little and acting a bit happy. It just might make you feel a little bit better!

Do you have any tips for how to make yourself feel better on a sick day? Let me know in the comments!

What To Do When Your 'Human' Shows

Is it just me or do you ever find yourself acting in a way that is particularly "human?" You say or do something that you aren't exactly proud of, and you feel ashamed of how human you actually are?

I know for me, I have many of these humbling moments in my life. I think it's safe to say that we all do. With that being said, I thought I would write down some advice for what to do when your "human" shows.

1. Accept the fact that we are all human, and humans make mistakes sometimes. Sure, you will mess up in your life, but you are not alone. We all have our faults and we are all so less than perfect. It's okay. 

2. Apologize when necessary. There will be times when you snap at someone in frustration and say things that you'll probably regret. You will most likely have a few moments where you do something that you wish you didn't do. Never be too prideful to accept responsibility for your actions and say you are sorry.

3. Don't be so hard on yourself. This goes right back to point #1. You're not perfect (no one is), and neither is anyone else. Apologize, learn from your mistake, and move on.

Is your 'human' showing? Don't panic. It happens to the best of us, and it's okay. Next time you have one of these "all-too-human" moments, learn from it, and use it as an opportunity to maybe be a little more understanding of others. 

Do you have any other advice for what to do when your "human" shows? Let me know in the comments!

It's Much More Than That - Compassion

Is it just me or do we sometimes get a little calloused and hard-hearted when it comes to dealing with other people? We see so much on television, in movies, in real life, that we get desensitized and forget that there are real people with real problems all around us. 

Today's word is: compassion. According to the dictionary, 'compassion' means "sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others."

To me, compassion is so much more than "sympathetic pity and concern" for another. To me, compassion is lending a helping hand to someone that you don't know. Compassion is taking into account that a person might be having a really terrible day before you decide to give them an attitude at the check out counter. Compassion is putting yourself on hold to help someone else in need.

If you look around wherever you are on any given day, there are bound to be lots of people in need of compassion. Be it a friend or a stranger, odds are that someone is in need of some love, attention, acceptance, forgiveness, compassion. The need is always there; we just need to be ready and available to see it. 

We need to realize that life is very real, and everyone is going through something difficult at one point or another. Unfortunately, there is not one magical "cure" for all of life's troubles. Every person, every situation is different, and deserves to be treated as such. Compassion can take many forms, and may look different depending on the person and situation it is being used in. 

Having compassion for someone may mean buying them a hot cup of coffee on a freezing cold day. It may mean giving someone a second chance that they don't really deserve, because in reality, we all make mistakes. It may also mean being sensitive to another person's needs and meeting them where they are at.

As you go through your day, I challenge you to open your heart and look for others who are in need of some compassion. It just might make all the difference in their life.

What does compassion mean to you?

Let's Talk About Stress

Is it just me or do you get stressed sometimes? You know, that feeling when you have a million and one things to do but no time to do them, and you feel like you can't breathe and your chest is about to explode???

Stress is a very real thing, and I think it's safe to say that it is something most people deal with on a pretty regular basis. I am no expert, but I do have a few ideas for how you can reduce and possibly even eliminate stress:

1. Make a list of everything you have to do. You already know how I feel about lists, so I won't go on any longer than this.

2. Utilize your time wisely.  This is crucial when you are feeling stressed. Sometimes this means sacrificing that extra hour of sleep in the morning so that you can wake up and get something done. Sometimes it means turning down a night out with your friends so you can get things done. Either way, you need to make the most of your time so that you can get as many things done as possible!

3. Don't be afraid to ask for help. So many times, we are too wrapped up in our own world or even too prideful to ask for help. If you are completely overwhelmed and in need of a helping hand, ask for one. Don't let that "I must do it all by myself" mentality get in your way.

4. Put things in perspective. This one is huge. When you are super stressed out about that paper due tomorrow or that approaching deadline at work, think about this: Will this have been worth the stress a year from now? Odds are, it won't even matter a year from now, so quit stressing so much!

5. Remember that stress is your choice, and there is really no point to it. Yes, you have a lot of things to do. Yes, your life is so crazy that it leaves you virtually no time to do any of it. But it will get done, and everything will work out in the end.  

Do you have any other tips for how to deal with or avoid stress?

Say What You Mean and Mean What You Say

Is it just me or do you ever feel hesitant to tell someone how you really feel about something? Maybe something has been bothering you for a while, but you haven't worked up the nerve to actually say something to the person for fear of....what, exactly?

I would consider myself a fairly non-confrontational person. I don't like to make conflict if there doesn't have to be conflict, and I don't like to say things that I know will make another person angry. But recently, I have learned that there comes a time when you just have to say what you feel. 

Sometimes, it is important for the other person to hear that you ARE upset, and that you MEAN what you are trying to get across. Sometimes, the other person doesn't even know that there is anything wrong in the first place, and the only way for them to know that you are upset is for you to tell them! 

Now, this does not mean that you have a right to lash out at someone and tell them your feelings in anger. Nor does it mean that you should always state your feelings in the heat of the moment. That often leads to some harsh words, maybe a few tears, and certainly a lot of regret. But if you give yourself some time to step back from the situation, gather your thoughts, and respond a bit later when you have a clear head, the outcome is almost sure to be better. 

In this time of "cooling off," you should think about exactly why you are upset. Do not use this opportunity to make a list of all the things that the other person has done wrong in the past. Really think about what is bothering you in this present moment. Also, try coming up with a way that you can tell the other person what is wrong without sounding mean and hurtful. (P.S. this is usually easier if you have someone you can run your "speech" by first). 

So the next time you find yourself in a situation that needs fixing, try taking a few moments to collect your thoughts before you speak. You have a right to say what you mean, but just make sure that you really mean what you say. If you don't, you might regret it later on.

Do you have any other advice for how to deal with speaking your mind? I would love to hear it!

Quote of the Week - Be Kind Always

Is it just me or do you ever come across people that seem just plain rude for no reason? It is almost a natural reaction to act rude right back to them, because after all, they did it first, right? WRONG.

This week's quote is a good one to keep in your pocket at all times, because I have a feeling you'll need to think back on it often:

"Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. 
Be kind. Always."

I have learned that many times, people who seem rude, or who give me an attitude right off the bat really have something else going on that has nothing to do with me. Maybe they are going through a rocky divorce, or they have to spend all night awake in the hospital with their sick child. Maybe they just got in a fight with their best friend, or a loved one recently passed away. Maybe they are simply having a really awful day. Does this give them a right to take it out on me, on us? No, but it certainly helps put things into perspective. 

Life is not always easy, and it's certainly not always fun. But what a better place this world would be if we could all be kind to one another always. It is all too easy to get wrapped up in our own little world, thinking only of ourselves. But if we take just a second to think of what another person might possibly be going through before shooting back a sassy answer, we could really learn something valuable.

So the next time you have the urge to lash out at someone or give them attitude right back, try and remember that, odds are, they are going through something in their life that is really difficult. Cut them some slack. And share this quote with others, because you never know when you might need someone to be kind to you when you are not able to be so kind yourself.

Have a good quote? Feel free to share it in the comments!